For the love of Tuck

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I wrote about Tucker before on FamilyFriendlyHQ

I am aware that sometimes the things I write are hard to read and that it can leave the reader feeling sad; but when I choose to write about Ethan and his life, I cannot leave the reality out and the truth is the reality is sad…it’s heartbreakingly sad.

Tucker is forever 15 now , and while us the parents know what will happen to our boys we are never prepared. Ever. How can anyone be prepared for losing someone they love especially if that someone is their child?

There is no crash course.

There is no ‘how to’.

There is just grief…shock…pain…heartache…darkness…

I have not lost a child to hunter syndrome…yet. Even though I type the word ‘yet’, I gloss over that in my head…for me, that ‘yet’ equals years and years…it is not worth thinking about in any other terms…I simply can’t.

I try not to ponder…but when you read about a little boy who just didn’t wake up…your mind begins to wonder and your heart feels that…I can feel the pain of Tucker’s mammy (especially) …I cried and cried…

It’s hard to explain, maybe even a little selfish on my part. I cried for Tucker, for his mammy, Casey, his daddy Jason,brother Dylan and his extended family but I cried for all us mammy’s …each and every other mother who walks my path…I cried for me too.

It was also another little boys birthday…Logan would have been 13, had he lived.

13.

I cried for his mammy, his family and for Tuckers mammy and family again.

How does Logan’s mammy carry on?

How will Tuckers mammy carry on?

And that seemingly selfish question pops into my head…how will I carry on?

How does any parent carry on?

I don’t know.

I imagine the only people who know the answer are those who have had to live through it…I don’t want to know…but Hunter Syndrome doesn’t care about what I want.

It is a relentless condition. A greedy, sneaky condition that takes our children away in the middle of the night …or it waits until our children have nothing left to give …

I know a lot of parents will be cuddling their kiddies extra tightly tonight because Tucker left his family without warning…without notice…

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There is a whole community grieving. We are grieving with a family who lost their 15 year old boy…we are all hoping and praying that it won’t happen to our kiddies but in the deepest darkest hour of the night the realisation hits us and we know…

 

Tuckers passing and Logan’s and those who left this earth far too early will never make it into mainstream media…there won’t be an outrage…there won’t be a campaign to help fund a cure…even though there is research and a clinic trial – it’s simply not effecting enough people and that is also the harsh reality we, the families have to live with.

For more information about ongoing research Click Here

Fly high ^^Tuckerman^^
And to all the angels before you- you are loved, you are missed; always.

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His smile; unforgettable
His eyes; most innocent
His heart; bursting with love
His soul; pure
His name ; Tucker
Beautiful innocent Tucker simply unforgettable
Oceans part us – love unites us
Grief consumes us
 

We love you Tucker and always will.
Rest in peace our little buddy.
#SOMUCH

 

Author

geraldinesmyth@gmail.com

Comments

Paula
June 22, 2016 at 11:13 pm

Hi sweetheart. I’ve been your follower for some months now. I know you’d put me on the lucky parents side of life. But you would never know how i wish I could fly through the ocean an give a mama bear hug to you. Being mama to 3 “healthy” kids, doesn’t make me a fortunate person. I grieve with you. I first read about Hunter’s with you. And believe me, I laugh out hard with your mean dictator and cry and sob knowing of sweet Ethan. Please let me tell you, that I’m a better person because of you. And because of Little Prince Ethan. My littlest is the same age and he very often asks about him. Mum! How’s he doing? And I know in a way, he’s too changed to a better person. My heart is with you all. Much much love from Argentina.❤



    June 23, 2016 at 7:49 am

    Paula ; Thank you so much. I am absolutely honoured and touched to hear that Ethan has touched your life even though there is an ocean between us. And to think of your child asking after him, well that just puts a smile on my face. Ethan has changed us all and I agree , he has a tendency to make us all ‘better’ people.
    Sending you and yours lots of blove and thank you for keeping up with us .
    We are currently launching a new site ..I’d love some feedback on it when it launches – if you like it or if you think it’s easy to use etc !



June 24, 2016 at 12:16 am

Such a heartbreakingly beautiful post. I’m so sorry for the loss of Tucker and Logan all the children taken too soon. My thoughts and prayers are with their families and with you and yours.



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